Book Review: Surviving Sue Should be a Movie

When I first read about the book Surviving Sue by Dr. Vicki Atkinson (2023) I felt some trepidation. The storyline piqued my interest, but would the content be too heavy? The story is Vicki’s, the daughter of a mother full of demons and dispositions toward alcoholism, depression, anxiety, and Munchausen’s, who suffered from Alzheimer’s later in life and rejected and ridiculed Vicki throughout.

The subject may seem heavy at first, but what comes through in the story is the grace and resilience with which Vicki survived Sue. Vicki’s story is an inspiration to survivor’s of trauma and rejection. Written with deep thoughtfulness and injected with humour, the story carries us through the many anecdotes of Sue’s life, some mortifying, some funny, some blameless, all dysfunctional.

The complex persona that was Sue has been well dissected by Vicki, a licensed professional counselor with degrees in counseling and psychology and a PhD in adult education. The desire to unravel the layers brings understanding on Vicki’s part as the daughter experiencing the chaos and trauma, and also brings understanding for the reader.

Through Vicki’s revelations we come to terms with the whys and whats of Sue, a gnawingly selfish mother, who fought vehemently, yet sometimes misguidedly, for the benefit of her disabled eldest daughter Lisa, while vilifying her brilliant youngest daughter, Vicki.

Several other real life characters play large parts in the story and the persona that is Sue. Her sisters Carolyn and Louisa, and Sue’s husband, Sonny.

The many moves across the US, as Sonny climbed the ladder of success, enabled Sue to fabricate a new story, play the victim, and hide her own dependencies while over-medicating Lisa. Sue however, kept it all together though in her ugly “gray-green”, the filing cabinet that held her secrets.

Each move also furthered the instability and chaos for the girls, as they would need to create new friendships, start at new schools or in Lisa’s case begin a new workshop.

Thank goodness for the angels that came into Vicki’s life at various points, teachers, doctors, social workers, friends and a lawyer. Their support and guidance is a gift that allows us to acknowledge the help that comes when we need it most. I exclaimed a definitive, “Yes!” out loud when Dr. Carole appears in the story with her blue halo. Luckily nobody was home to hear me.

There is so much to the story that spans the decades of Sue’s life and thus Vicki’s, and I don’t want to provide any spoilers. The insights you gain will be yours and there will be many. The inspiration of experiencing another warrior’s story is cathartic. And the gentle removal of tissue paper like layers is a gift that allows us to see more clearly beneath the fragilities and frailties of human complexities.

It eventually is all about love. Love at the core under the tissue paper layers. Sue’s desire to be loved. Vicki left unloved by her mother, but deeply loved by her father. Vicki loving her sister, daughter and husband. Vicki finding a courageous capacity to love, within herself. And eventually caring for and releasing Sue with love, grace and forgiveness.

A truly fascinating read by an author that teaches us what survival, courage, and resilience really look like. Surviving Sue is perfectly named, and should be a movie that must be experienced far and wide. Undoubtedly each of us will find something within the story that we easily relate to. Surviving Sue may be Vicki’s story of survival, and more than that, it is an inspiring survival guide.

At the beginning of the first chapter, Vicki Atkinson shares a quote by Brené Brown,

“One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through and it will be someone else’s survival guide.”

Vicki Atkinson has done exactly that! Thank you Vicki!

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Click on this link to purchase the book via Amazon

Click this link to purchase the book via Amazon in Canada

Click on this link to connect with Vicki on her blog, Victoria Ponders.